I'm a chef and I enjoy wine and coffee a little too much according to boring people.

illkim:

I’ve been laughing at this for 3 days

(via ruinedchildhood)

Notes
264303
Posted
3 days ago
girl:babe come over
boy:I can't I'm having a threesome with an older couple
girl:my parents aren't home
boy:I know
Notes
211752
Posted
3 days ago

donrickles:

Toy Story but for adult toys. The main characters are still named Woody and Buzz.

(via askinnyblackman)

Notes
4519
Posted
3 days ago
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